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The Best April Fools' Day Tech Jokes of 2017

1 is a  when you shouldn’t believe any product announcement being made, as there’s an excellent chance it’ll be utter nonsense. And if it turns out to be real, then either the marketing folk need to be fired for launching on on that , or your product needs a rethink, as the world clearly thought it was a joke.

We’re here to guide you through the nightmare of what’s real and isn’t with our favorite gags for 2017. Keep checking back, as we’ll update with new ones that tickle our funny bone.

Lyft Mono

Ride-hailing app Lyft has gone all out with this one. The Mono is a piece of wearable tech for grabbing a Lyft ride with just a flick of the thumb. The LED lighting array — in magenta, naturally — pulsates at different speeds, depending on how close your Lyft car is. There’s a glitzy website devoted to the Mono, and even a pop-up shop in San Francisco where you can try it out, according to The Verge. But don’t fall for it — the Mono is very much an April ’ Day joke.

However, that’s not going to stop Lyft giving a few of the versions it built for the promotion away, and you can enter here.

Man Crates Man Freights

Gift service Man Crates now lets you do more than send a crate as a gift. The Man Freights service enables you to deliver it yourself, inside a crate of your own. Provided you’re a “medium-sized person” and can get to a delivery center, you’ll get nailed inside the crate, ready to be handed over to the recipient after only two or three business days.

OnePlus Dash Energy

Dash Charge is OnePlus’s own fast charging system for its smartphones, and now it’s introducing Dash Energy, which brings power-boosting goodness to you personally. Apparently, it’s a “Neural performance enhancer instilled into a caffeinated beverage suitable for human consumption,” which sounds an awful lot like an energy drink to us. Check out the video above to see the effects, which alertness, energy, and concentration.

The great thing is you can actually try it out, because OnePlus will be distributing Dash Energy at a few special locations in London, plus through online through promotions in Europe, Finland, and India on April 1. You can find a list of them here.

Lexus Lane Valet

Lexus feels our pain. There’s nothing worse than getting stuck behind a slow lane hog, but with its new Lane Valet feature, we can shift them out of the way safely and easily. It’s autonomous driving technology, but for the car in front of you.

Kik Storyz

We love subtle April Fools’ Day gags, and this is definitely one of them. Kik has introduced Storyz, a way to share tiny video clips through the platform that friends can subscribe to and watch. The videos then expire after 23 hours and 57 minutes. Wait. That’s almost exactly what Facebook, Instagram, and WhatsApp copied from Snapchat, right? Kik’s not falling for it, and neither should you. The only thing is if Kik does add a Story-style feature in the future, this may come back to haunt it.

World of Tanks — Next Stop: Mars

Another April Fools’ gag you can actually try out for yourself. World of Tanks heads to Mars for a limited time, where you battle against each other and the alien hordes in a spectacular low-gravity environment, complete with teleportation units for the ultimate in surprise attacks. The game mode, called Next Stop: Mars, is only available between March 31 and April 2.

SkunkLock Organic

Want an environmentally friendly way of protecting your bike, that also looks a tiny bit cute? Then you want the SkunkLock Organic, a follow-up to the company’s unusual bike lock that’s filled with a vomit-inducing gas. That’s right, the SkunkLock isn’t the April Fools’ gag. The SkunkLock Organic attaches a real skunk to your bike.

Roku SnackSuggest

It’s sometimes difficult to satisfy food cravings when you’re watching game of Thrones. Roku’s new SnackSuggest feature says you need chicken wings, mutton, and ale to complete the experience. For Vampire Diaries, how about some garlic fries and red velvet cupcakes? It’s scientific too, basing snack recommendations on your BMI, dietary requirements, and taste preferences. Watching The Walking Dead may never be the same again …

Honda H-Swipe

Why restrict Tinder’s popular swipe-based method of finding a date to an app? Honda realized the windscreen wipers on its cars could perform a similar function, and so the automaker is introducing s-wipers, the H-Swipe app, and geo-location tech on future vehicles. Location data finds a potential date, and the wipers are used to signal your interest — left for “phwoor!” and right for “nahhh” presumably.

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